Episode 44: Refresh for the New Year

New Year, same basic us! In this episode, we are sharing a few of the things that we want to focus on for 2022. Ways we want to show up, what we want to give our attention to. Less of a resolution and more of a refresh on some key life things. 

We didn’t have a ton of links or references in this episode but we did want to let you know about our PATREON!! We’re revamping our Patreon offers to includes access to our monthly Making An Effort Magazine, video recordings and our annual online cocktail party, check it out! It would mean so much to us if you’d consider supporting the pod this way. :)

>>> Click here to read the computer generated transcript (note that the transcript isn't perfect)

Mel: Hello, welcome back to the making and effort podcast, the podcast where you get to drop in on a conversation with two friends, discussing all the things they make an effort with, and some of the things they don't. Um, hello everybody. Hello

Gabby: hello. Hello. Happy new year again. I know we already said that. Then the last episode is I feel like it bears saying it

Mel: again. Of course, of course, of course. Um, hi, are you, how is life in. Quarantine Nashville.

Gabby: Yep. So we are recovering from COVID. Um, I know we actually had a couple messages from some of you saying that you are also in a little bit of COVID isolation right now. Um, and you enjoyed last week's episode in isolation, so I'm sorry. Happy to be in the same boat. Um, but no, we're actually fine. We had. One or two days that were, it was a little bit like a sick word, but. We're all fine now. And we're just waiting out our little isolation time. So it's all good.

Mel: Such a gorgeous day here today. It's like the sun is beaming in through the skylight and the, my hair rubber coordin and it's blue. So it's one of those crispy delicious. I know

Gabby: you have the dreamiest little setup there. She's at this little, like all white. I'm just going to set the tone, but it's like an all white. Like attic tucked away with it, somewhat living plant behind her.

Mel: It's very, very fairly, it's actually one of those like icy plums. It's so hard to kill my God. I am crushing

Gabby: it. You're doing great. That that plant is really. You know, thinking new year, new me and I'm like always in this like dungeon dark. Cause it, you know, it's, it's always 6:00 AM pretty early whenever we're recording. So in the winter time, that means it's very dark and I'm always just like holed up in my sweater and this dark basement and yeah,

Mel: I have a, I had a call with one of my one-to-one clients this morning. She's in Sydney. She's an Australian. Okay. And so when, like we have to make it work. So we chat, uh, we have our session at 9:00 AM my time. So it must be, I don't know. I can't remember, but it's like dusk at her time. So as our call was going today, it was like golden R and then the sunset. And by the end of our Cole, she was in darkness. I was like, shot. But it was just,

Gabby: yeah, it was so cool, like summer by her as well

Mel: of summer. So she was all like in a tank top, but I'm sitting here in my beignet. Wow.

Gabby: Wow.

Mel: Anyway, um, so Gabs and I thought we would, um, we would spend some time talking about, what we would like to, or what we generally try to do a little refresh on. Um, when the turn of the year happens. And so I'm kind of avoiding all every language referenced to new year and goals because that has

Gabby: credit solutions and blah, blah, blah.

Mel: Um, so we talked about how it might be fun to just share a little bit about the ways that we try to refresh different aspects of our life. Um, at this like, Turning point of a, of a year. Yeah.

Gabby: Yeah. I think, I don't know. I actually always really love a new year and I know that for some people this season of the year can feel triggering with like, you know, people yelling at you for diets and health related stuff and blah, blah, blah. And that's all that toxic stuff. But I actually, I feel like I've, I've gotten pretty good at tuning that side of it out, but I really am interested in, in like just taking inventory, like in a very shame-free way of what happened in the year before what I liked about it, what I didn't like about it and just setting some new intentions for the new year. I, I love this stuff for me. I'm also the kid that like, Loved buying, you know, school pencils and notebooks and stationary and having like a new, like September school planner. And so I think people who enjoy that kind of stuff like the new year and that's okay. And this is okay if it's not you, but

Mel: it's okay if it's not you. And I know that a lot of people are like, Fatigued from the last year as well and are like, hang on. I don't like, I am not ready to do another challenge just because the clock turned 12 and we entered 20 22. So, um, yeah, I get that. I'm with you solidarity to that. You do not need to change one single thing. Um, and so if you can suspend your own feelings about. Um, I think it's, I think it's cool to just take a little bit of stock. Um, um, and it's not like, honestly, the things I've written down that I'm going to talk about here. Really practical things, rather, rather than like, I'm going to be more mindful of, you know, like, no, these are very practical things that I'm like, I need to refresh. I need to reset the button on this thing. And here's a natural pose. Yeah. Normal rhythm to just do that. So, yeah.

Gabby: Well, and I also think, I mean, before we dive into like the. The things that we get like to get up to at this time of year. Um, I also think like new year, Monday, whatever they kept, that stuff can happen whenever, like, course I always think about that. Like I think especially since becoming a mom and working from home and. Having to juggle a few things that I was not used to having to juggle before having kids, I have really been freed by this idea that you can have a fresh start whenever you want one. And if you don't want one in January, that's fine. But if you want one on a Wednesday in March, you can, you can decide like I'm going to try something new and I don't need to wait for a Monday and I don't need to wait for a new planner to show up, but I don't need any of that. Like I can make some changes now and they will make a difference in my life if I want them to. And I think that's the flip side of, of that is like there's no, I think that has always kind of that, that the kind of thinking has really released me from feeling the impending. Well, why is that anything up? I'm just going to fail anyway, because for me, if I still just, you know, decide to restart. August. That's great. Of course. You know, I don't know. Anyway,

Mel: I actually feel like this, this kind of refresh of things usually starts happening for me in early December. Like I, I, Dave and I have always like for as long as I can remember, um, spent a good part of December, really like purge in our house. So we find a really. But especially because we know with kids, there's going to be an influx of new things or different things coming in on for ourselves as well. Um, and it's usually the time where I'm like, I need, like, there's a lot more. Visual clutter with Christmas and all that kind of stuff. I'm usually like, I really need things to be paired back before we own anything else. So this December we did that, we did like, oh, just all of this stuff. Like the beauty products that you haven't looked at under the bathroom covers. Underwear that you're just like, not picking out to wear for two years because you don't want to wear it. And you're like in denial that you should just put it in the fabric. Recycling. Yes. Um, all of that stuff. What else did we do? Oh, like, I don't know, stuff like if there's plant pots that have plants that have died, like buying another plant for that pump, like really basic stuff. Um, And yeah, just re refresh and getting rid of, I purged my clothes in December, as you know, it's been three years that I have hung on to this one thing that I really liked the look of, but it's not my style anymore. Yeah. It happened in December for me. So it's almost like that was, that was the big, big coal I love.

Gabby: Um, yeah, I really love that. Yeah. And do you remember when it actually really reminded me? You remember when the Marie Kondo documentary came out? I think two years ago in January. And like, all I would see on Instagram was like, people like organizing their drawers and whatever. I was actually thinking about that because I opened my, my bathroom drawer. And was looking inside. I was like, this is a mess I need to Marie Kondo this stat. Uh, but yeah, I don't know. It's just, it's also just fun. I think it's always kind of love it. So

Mel: I don't know. I am so here for it. I love getting rid of stuff. Decluttering is like, yeah, I love so much. And I, especially because I used to be someone. But loads of stuff from the charity shop, I feel like pride that I have changed my ways. Um, I feel like I can, I can let go of things pretty easily for the most part. But, um, I will, uh, I'm gonna circle back to caveat that this purge in December was even more essential because a lot of my dad's stuff, when he moved out of his house, ended up at my house. Right. Brother's stuff as well. And like the interim before he gets his new place. And so there was all that that was making it feel like. Um, we've got our bedrooms painted, so that was a really good incentive to be like, I had to take all my clothes. I'd have my wardrobe anyway, to get the, for the Panther to the Panton there. So I may as well, not just put everything back, um, based super ruthless about yeah, like clothes and that kind of thing. Yeah. So what about you? What kind of refreshing things? Yeah. And to be at the fore for you this year.

Gabby: So I, there's a few things that I do every year that are just kind of my own traditions, which is kind of fun to have gotten to the point in my mid life where I have these little personal traditions. No, no cute. Yeah. My little personal, I think when you've done something like two or three years in a row, that's the tradition, right? Yeah. You call it that for sure. So, uh, one of the things that I do is I go through my, I do like a little digital detox, so. Unsubscribed from a lot of newsletters and, um, you know, just kind of go through my inbox and do that whole thing. And that always feels really great, like really great. Um, yeah. And I mean, these are just, these are not big things. These are things like, I think we all kind of do on some level, but on a silent

Mel: practically as well because everybody, yeah. Emailing you their

Gabby: email. Yeah, exactly. In January. Yep. And in December I feel like I kind of get a little bit of a headstart on it in December and around, um, around like black Friday time, because you just get all these emails from people. You didn't even know you. We're following. Um, so yeah, I do that. And then I usually do like a little Instagram purge and this year I'm being particularly ruthless about it. Like, I just feel a little bit of information overload. Um, and I took a little bit of a, a three week, a three week break from Instagram before. Christmas holiday, um, last year, this past year. And I think a lot of my fatigue from social media just comes from like signing up to too much. And it doesn't mean that it's all bad, but I get to decide what information sources are good for me in this season. And that could change eventually. And maybe, yeah. Need other information channels, but for now I'm just kind of whittling my stuff down or my followers down to people I know in real life or people that I have a good relationship with online. And I'm kind of getting rid of. A lot of the brands and the meme accounts and like all the stuff that like, they still bring me some amount of joy, but I can look them up if I need to, I don't need, oh,

Mel: man. It is such a big thing. It's not, you have been having this conversation with so many people recently. Um, and I think the more I keep reflecting on, obviously I'm considering moving away from Instagram and the next little while. In terms of how I market my business and stuff. So, yeah. Which is, which is scary, but feels like the right move to make for NY until we know differently. But, um, we've been told, yeah, people I've been talking to, we've been just been thinking about it. Like even like before 10 o'clock I could know a bite, a big world disaster, what somebody is having for breakfast. The new offers at the coffee shop. I like somebody's favorite, like quote, somebody, uh, like plans for the day. Like, do I need to know all of that too? I need to be my does my little tiny capacity bring in the opportunity. To absorb all of that and process all of that before I've had my second cup of tea. No, that's the truth. And that's my responsibility. It's not because somebody shouldn't be talking about what they had for breakfast. Totally. It's my responsibility to, to be the guardian of my brand. Yeah. Um, and my eyes, so. Yeah, that's not, I don't, I'm not, when I talk about like purging and I'm sure you feel, let's see I'm gobs like, or moving away from Instagram, it's not like a moral, morally loaded from a no, maybe it should be, but it's not. It's more like actually, um, I find it so tiring and that's.

Gabby: Yeah, well, some of us, some of our jobs do require an element of social media to them. And, but I, yeah, I a hundred percent agree. It's not, it's not morally charged. It's just a, I need a break from information and we have so much information in our society. I think for me, one of the big things that I'm trying to navigate right now, and I don't have like a clear. Answer for myself about, but I am just processing. So I'll process here with you is, um, you know, I think there's been a lot of really big social issues that have occurred online in the last few years. You know, you have important things like the pandemic and how we respond to it and black lives matter. And the states we've had elections and you know, there's a lot of big stuff that. I, I don't, I think it's important to have like human versus social responses to. Our environment and to pull it like to politics and to ideas, but I, what I'm, we're kind of re questioning and reframing myself for myself right now is how much am I responsive to that needs to happen on an Instagram story versus in real life. You know what I mean? And, and sometimes, you know, Responding to something publicly can be really beneficial to some people, but I just get a lot of anxiety when I, I talk about big stuff like that. Um, it's like really bad for my mental health. Um, and so just trying to weigh up and sometimes again, it's worth that it's worth that discomfort to speak up about certain things. But I think I just need a little bit of a refresh within my own self about really navigating. What that looks like for me and you know, what, how can I respond to things in real life, more than I'm responding to them online, but also not totally negating the impact that social media act like. Action can have.

Mel: Yeah, that is a really, really tricky balance of our generation is like so much of what we're doing it online to speak out about things or be educated by things is, is like making a huge difference. Yeah. Also, is it also moving us away from some of the more impactful ways? Yeah. You know, that we, we, we could take as well. Those ways we could take, I think we should probably do an episode on this. I actually, this is a really cool a topic. We should probably do an episode on. The whole conflation of online activism, privilege and council culture. Yeah,

Gabby: let's do it. That sounds like a fun episode. Okay. Put a pin in that. Let's get back to refresh. Yeah,

Mel: no, but that's a good side trail around the idea of. Minding the things that are coming into our yeah. Our online space and being a bit more precious about.

Gabby: Yeah. And you know, there for me, a lot of the things that I'm unsubscribing from right now on my social media are more like. Brands and celebrities and like things where it's like, I know you exist. So, you know, if I need a sweater for me, well, I'll look you up, but I don't need to be sold a sweater every, every Wednesday when I come on or, you know, whatever. Yes.

Mel: So I know that I will go down the rabbit trail. Looking at what, what you've got and your shop. And I don't need to be doing that. Hey, everyone. We wanted to take a quick break in this episode and let you know that we have a Patreon page now. Uh, you know, we love, love, love doing this podcast each week and connected with you and our Patreon page is a way for you to get to hang out. Um, and for us all to be together even more and help us cover the costs of running the podcast. So we can keep our sponsored ads to a minimum it's just $5 or £4 a month to access it. And we have some really exciting plans for spending more time with you guys there this year. So when you become a patron. You'll get access to our monthly, making an effort magazine where we're going to be sharing all of our best recommendations for food and books and TV and music and what we're wearing and all that good stuff at you'll. Get a patreon only extra video podcasts from us each month and an invitation to join us for our annual making an effort virtual cocktail party, where we get to hang out together. Um, maybe each other. So, if you want to join the making and effort gang, you can find a link to our patron and the show notes, or you can go to www.patreon.com/makinganeffortpodcast. Can't wait to see you inside, Gabby: which brings me to my next, my, my next refresh item. And this is kind of combined a little bit with. But we talked about before with clutter and also a little bit of a new year end tensiony thing. I had mentioned to Mel last year that I'm feeling very inspired to do a little stint of time where I don't buy anything new for myself as much as possible and for my home as much as possible. Um, so. I originally was going to say, I'm going to do it for a whole year. And she was like, no, I've done this before. You should definitely just take it. And a small chunk, like commit to six months. Uh, so I'm going to try that for six months. And it's not a hard and fast rule. Like, you know, I'm not going to buy like a used toilet bowl cleaner, but I think kind of what, where it comes from for me, And this isn't a sound all like moral and high and mighty. And I genuinely don't mean it as like a judgment on anyone else, but just more a reflection on my own, like my own buying habits and my own consumerism habits. And, um, I just want to be more conscientious about not needing to bring more stuff into the house. And do using what I already have and trying to find innovative ways to utilize the things that are already in my home to serve me over and over again. So, so really like reusing stuff. I'm more recycling stuff within my own home. Not just recycle, put into the bin. Um, and, uh, for me, I mean, like I'm a maximalist, so cluttered doesn't bother me as much. And we've talked about that in a previous episode, um, maximalism versus minimalism. So I'm not coming from it from a minimalism perspective. I'm more coming from. As a maximalist. I love to just buy stuff. I love to like get new things. I love to open packages and have, you know, like Russian nesting dolls of stuff coming out of my Amazon packages. And so for me, it's more, that's fine. You can love things, but love the things that you already have. Um, in addition to. New stuff. So, so yeah, that's kind of, that's the end of my list. Really? Um, do you have things on your list that you would like to share?

Mel: Well, the other thing that I was that I really want to be more intentional about this year is a bite being proactive about my health. So not in a, not in a, in a like body where. In ship kind of way at all, but actually as you approach the big FORO, it feels like things are starting to show. There

Gabby: were,

Mel: so I have probably known that I need a new glasses prescription. I mean, I got glasses in university. No, yeah, yeah. University and. I think I've worn them like for a month and never worn them again. Um, but I am really struggling at nighttime with my eyes and driving at night. And I mean, I could put this off and off and off and just betcha bite up, but, you know, making appointments for that or, you know, noticing stuff and your cycle, um, You know, getting support for that or trying to understand what your body's doing more. Um, or if, you know, like I want to go and get my ears looked up to see if like that I had a bit of bite of vertigo before Christmas, and I'm like, I wonder, is there an inner ear thing instead of just like letting it pass and cross your fingers, that doesn't happen again. Do you know what I mean? Just like actually go. Look and say, and, and prioritize those things and prioritize, taking the supplements that I know are going to help with things that I'm struggling with or looking into them, not, not just kind of hoping and crossing your fingers that they just pass, but yeah, just being a bit more bothered and proactive, upright my body. Yeah.

Gabby: I think that sounds awesome. And you get new glasses out of it. So that's fine. I am

Mel: for sure. Going to get glasses. I am walking opticians, strong prescription. I met this. I know this I've been in such denial. I don't know. I don't know. This is a weird, this is weird, but I have like a weird. Claustrophobia feeling about glasses makes me a bit nervous about like, just having to help, like having something there on me interest. I get this, I get this about like hair bubbles on my wrist. Oh my goodness.

Gabby: I get that.

Mel: If I go to bed and there's a hair bubble on my wrist. Uh, it really

Gabby: makes me, I don't like it. I just get an off,

Mel: like, yeah. I have maybe a bit more sensory issues than I would admit to so intentional about health, getting the mother fricking glasses. Um, getting to the bottom of things that are recurring issues in my health. Absolutely. Those are the things. Um, those are the things for me and Dave and I are both have both been talking about wanting to eat, walk every day, make sure that we're walking every day. Um, and I was listening to, I think it was armchair expert. Oh, I can't even remember. It was maybe his, like, they did like a summary of 20, 21 they're episodes and they had one, this one guy, this one doctor on talking about like, even in the winter, if you're able to go and get to get like 15 minutes of direct sunlight, even if it's cloudy or he has a, on your, on your body in the morning. It can absolutely like it reduces your likelihood of depression and all kinds of stuff. All kinds of health benefits. Yeah. By a bazillion percent. Yes. Please fact check that somebody, cause I don't want to solicit, oh wait, depression, obviously, but I know that I know that it's good to get out in the fresh air and to do that more. And I know how easy it is for me to just sit inside and Fafa bite with my work. And not do that in a day, especially in the winter, especially in the winter. So yeah, stuff like that. Um, I also am really determined this year that I'm gonna make this house home air. Yeah. And you know, all the things that I really want to want to do, like put in a built-in cupboard into the living room and do all that kind of stuff. Like I am. Get my ass off Pinterest and actually make those things happen. Um, that's so fun.

Gabby: So

Mel: yeah, I mean, I'm determined to do that for sure.

Gabby: Yeah. We're doing a lot of that stuff this year, finally because Chris and I. We're both hoarders. So we have so much stuff in our house. And the thing that no one really talks about when they talk about renovations is like, you have to clear out all your stuff before you, like, if it's a paint job, if it's whatever, you've gotta be willing to like get in there and get every little like paperclip. Whatever, what have you out of there? So we're doing a kitchen remodel that starts this month, that has been long in the works. And I am very excited for that, because that feels like one of those things that. Again, like Chris would I have been talking about doing for years and we just haven't done it. You know what I mean? Like, it's just one of those things where like, no, it seems like too much hassle, but we really like, we, we really have reached a breaking point with our kitchen. So without going into too much detail, so, uh, it's time and I'm excited for that refreshes. I think I totally get that. Like the getting house projects done that you've been putting

Mel: off. Definitely. It's the thing, it's the thing that I, and obviously there's financial things to those as well. It costs money to do those things. So it has to be the right time. Um, but. I feel like I'm done when Jenna Vida, you know, when you're just like, yes. Now, like get the art that you like, just go and do it and put it up, you know, by the lights for the walls that you want to get, just, you know, see it for them, get them and put them up, call someone to come and put them up. If you can't stop looking at things and wishing that they were different and just do it. And that sounds very. Reductive of, of the whole process. Um, yeah, I, I have a tendency to stall. Is that any information

Gabby: it's not, but that's okay. We're S new year. Same us. That's the thing.

Mel: Yeah. Near Sam, us with a little refresh of the things in the periphery cold. Okay. So I'll, I also just want to make sure that, um, We put out there, our next call in episode, we are working on. So we thought it would be fun to get a collection of your most embarrassing stories. Yes. So this is the kind of thing that I. Die over. I, if there is a Buzzfeed article on Facebook, that's like, um, most cringe, most embarrassing things that people are sharing on Twitter. I am like so fast type that I am hitting that button so fast and then like screenshotting them and sending them to Gabby. And because they make me laugh so, so much. So we thought be fun to do our own little collection of that. So here is what we need. If you have a really embarrassing story that you're willing to share with us, Our listeners. Um, we would love you to either voicemail that into us and the directions on how you can do that can be find on our website on the contact page. Um, if you've never sent like a voice note in or done that before. We give you a full rundown and fudge data. It's pretty easy. Um, or you can email us at hello@makinganeffortpodcast.com. So in a couple of weeks, we're going to record this episode. We're going to share our own embarrassing stories. God always looking at me like, or if you ha, if you have like, um, you know, an urban myth, embarrassing story that, you know, happened to somebody. Okay. That you think is absolutely worth. Sharon let's have that January can be a long month. February can be a long month. So we thought we would inject a little bit of collective embarrassment and hilarity to this time. So send us your cringey moments.

Gabby: Yeah, let's get through this winter with some laughs and. We'll be there. Yeah.

Mel: All right. Thanks everybody for coming back to listen to us. Um, and we'll be back next week. Bye bye.